Forgive and Move On

How to Forgive and Move On

1. Realize that your bitterness, hatred or resentment doesn't affect the other person at all. In fact, they may not know how you feel, and if they do, they may not care.

2. Realize the best way to “win” and move on is to live the happiest and best life possible. There’s nothing to match doing something with your life, and feeling satisfied, and enjoying who you are.

3. Look for the silver lining in the cloud, and learn what you can from the bad experience. Often, it can make you a much better person – who is kinder, wiser, and with greater character.

4. Remember the people who were there for you, and who helped you to feel much better about things. Focus on their qualities – and not the other person’s!

5. Be compassionate and understanding with yourself. Emotional wounding always takes its toll on you. It leaves you feeling beaten, and torn up inside.

6. Decide not to think about the story again. You’re hurting yourself more by going over it. Choose to thing about the people who bring joy to your life, and the life experiences that leave you feeling proud. 

7. Remember that the meaning of “forgiveness” is “untie” … And you want to be free from that person and the pain. So, decide to untie yourself, and move on with your life.

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

Child Abuse

The biggest myth about child abuse:

The biggest myth is that the dangers to children come from strangers. In most cases, the perpetrator is someone the parent or child knows, and is often trusted by the child and family. 

National No Smoking Day

National NO SMOKING DAY ... a challenge and aspiration for many.

Sleep

I tried to sleep...but my mind wouldn't let me.
*My Words, My Canvas*

Self-Esteem

What is Self-Esteem?

1. Self- Esteem is our emotional evaluation of our own worth and value.

2. It is related to how I judge myself as a person, and the subsequent attitudes I hold towards myself.

3. Thus, it is based on my beliefs about myself and the emotions related to these.

4. It is my personal judgment about whether or not I have what it takes to face the basic challenges of life, and whether I’m worthy of respect and happiness.

5. Our level of self-esteem (high or low) affects the way we are and act in the world, and the way we relate to everyone else around us. All our thoughts, feelings, decisions and actions are influenced by our personal self-esteem.

6. Our self-esteem is influenced and shaped by our positive or negative life experiences.

7. In the early years, parents are the most significant influences on self-esteem. It is crucial that they create an environment of unconditional love, and a stable sense of being cared for and respected.

8. During the school years, academic achievement is a significant contributor to the development of self-esteem development, as are social experiences. As children grow up, they start using social comparison to assess whether they did better or worse than other children in different activities.

9. In adolescence, peer influence plays a much more significant role. In particular, successful friendships and social acceptance develop a sense of inner confidence that leads to a health, and high, self-esteem. However, being ignored or rejected by peers results in feelings of loneliness, creates self-doubt, and leads to low self-esteem.

10. Childhood experiences that lead to a health self-esteem include being listened to, being treated with warmth and respect, being given appropriate attention and affection, having your accomplishments recognized, and being taught how to deal appropriately with mistakes and failures. Experiences that contribute to low self-esteem include repeatedly being ignored, harshly criticized, ridiculed, abused, or being expected to be perfect and get it right all the time.

bigchuneradio.com Big Chune Radio

Good Afternoon everyone , please dont forget to tune in todays show . Todays topic is " drugs part 2 ". To listen live go to bigchuneradio.com and search saving our kids. To download on your , iphone , ipad , or Android go to your app store or market and download tunein radio , and then search big chune radio. The show is from 2:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m. central time. Please show us love by posing you're comments on what you think about the show or your own opinion.

March is National Women's Month!

March is National Women’s Month!

Can you think of one woman that has impacted your life in a positive manner over the past year?

Drug Name: Molly

Molly has been a common drug lately and everyone is trying it. Molly is known for giving users a feeling of euphoria and empathy toward others. Pop 1 and you’re sweating? Let me explain why you’re sweating: Molly is a drug made up of cocaine, crack, ecstasy, meth & bath salt. It slows your heart rate 10x the normal limit and wreaks havoc on your immune system with just one pill. Take two and it damages your brain without you even being able realize it. It becomes an addiction and soon a cry for help. By the fifth one you take, it starts killing your organs & preventing them from functioning as normal. It increases your chance of stroke & heart attack and can cause your lungs to stop functioning all together! It is a very powerful & VERY DANGEROUS drug! More harmful than crack itself.

Bullying

If you think your child is being bullied, it's time to take action…now. Bullying is not something that just goes away on its own, it is not something that children can just “work out” without mediation, and it is not something kids will just naturally outgrow. If you know (or think) that your child is being bullied, your participation is critical to a successful outcome. Some suggested actions include:

Make it safe for your child to talk to you. When your child comes to you to talk about a bullying experience, try to avoid having an emotional reaction. It can be scary for a child to hear that a parent is planning to lash out at a peer or parent. Calmly ask questions until you feel you completely understand the situation (Is it bullying, a peer conflict, or a misunderstanding?). Try not to leap into action right away, but instead focus on making sure your child feels taken care of and supported. Without blaming the bully, remind your kid that everyone has a right to feel safe and happy at school, and applaud the courage it took to take a stand and talk to you. Make a commitment to work with both your child and the school administration to resolve the issue.

Teach your child to say “Stop!” or go find an adult. Research shows that most bullies stop aggressive behavior within 10 seconds, when someone (either a victim or a bystander) tells the perpetrator to stop in a strong and powerful voice. You, as the parent, can role-play an assertive response. Demonstrate the differences between aggressive and assertive and passive voices, as well as body language, tone of voice, and words used. If staying “stop” with an assertive voice does not work, teach your child to find an adult right away.

Talk with your child’s principal and classroom teacher about the situation. Make it clear that you are committed to partner with the school in being part of the solution. Also emphasize that your expected outcome is that your child’s ability to feel safe and happy at school is fully restored. Ask the principal to share the school’s bullying policy, and make sure any action plan begins with notifying other teachers, recess aids, hallway monitors, and cafeteria staff so that everyone who comes in contact with your child can be on the lookout and poised to intervene should the bullying be repeated.

Arrange opportunities for your child to socialize with friends outside of school to help build and maintain a strong support system. Try reaching out to neighborhood parents, local community centers with after-school activities, and your spiritual community. The more time your child can practice social skills in a safe environment, the better. Children who have friends are less likely to be bullying victims—and, if your child is bullied, friends can help ease the negative effects.

Don’t go it alone. When supporting a child through a bullying situation, parents often discover previously unnoticed issues that may contribute to the child’s vulnerability. In addition to working with the school to help resolve the immediate issue, parents should also consider reaching out to physical and mental healthcare providers to discuss concerns about diagnosed or undiagnosed learning issues, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, etc.
Encourage your child to stick with a friend (or find someone that can act as a buddy) at recess, lunch, in the hallways, on the bus, or walking home. Kids are more likely to be targeted when they are alone. If your child doesn't have a friend to connect with, work with the school to help find someone to act as a safety partner.

If cyberbullying is an issue, teach your child to bring it to the attention of an adult, rather than responding to the message. Many children fail to realize that saying mean things about someone on the Internet or through text messaging is a form of bullying. Make sure your child knows that you take cyberbullying seriously, and that you’ll be supportive through the process of handling the situation.

Help your child become more resilient to bullying. There’s a lot parents can do to help “bully proof” their kids. Here are two biggies: first, provide a safe and loving home environment where compassionate and respectful behavior is modeled consistently. Second, acknowledge and help your child to develop strengths, skills, talents or other positive characteristics. Doing so may help your kid be more confident among peers at school.

Provide daily and ongoing support to your child by listening and maintaining ongoing lines of communication. When your child expresses negative emotions about peers, it’s helpful if you acknowledge these feelings and emphasize that it’s normal to feel this way. After actively listening to the recounted bullying incident, discuss the practical strategies in this article together, especially the ones your child thinks will be most helpful.

Follow Up. Even after your child’s bullying situation has been resolved, be sure to stay in touch with your child and the school to avoid a relapse of the issues. Keep the lines of communication open with your child, and learn the signs of bullying so that if another issue arises, you’ll be prepared to get involved early and effectively. Although a last resort, consider moving your child out of the current school or social environment. This may be a necessary action, and it sends the message that your child truly does not have to tolerate such treatment. Once established, social reputations among peers can be very difficult to eliminate. A fresh start in a new school environment may be a viable solution.

Child Abuse

In Texas, more than 4 children die from child abuse or neglect on average every week, 176 children are confirmed victims every day, and 7 children are abused or neglected every hour.

Need Counseling in the Orange County, California Area?

Dear Readers who are based in California,

I am so proud and happy to announce that one of my old colleagues has started their private practice in the Orange County, California Area.

I am so pleased to announce the acquisition of André Evans, MA, MFT. André has joined our profession as a therapist (i) and life coach. Recently, André was elected to our Jr. Executive Board in our Mental Health Department.

André, MA, MFT, discovered his passion for counseling while leading children, adolescents, and families while he worked with client’s in their homes and for school districts throughout the Counties of San Bernardino, Los Angeles, and presently in Orange.

Through these experiences André, worked with students and parents treating their behavioral, educational, and life challenges. André’s area of counseling include working with children through conflict resolution at home (e.g., parent & sibling conflict, divorcé, and family re-unification, learning disabilities, bullying, educational planning, maladaptive behaviors, trauma, and consultation with individual’s treatment teams). André Evans, MA, MFT has acquired much of his experience in the Greater Los Angeles Region counseling individuals, couples, and groups throughout the entertainment industry. Many members of his current and former clientele have been actors, professional sport athletes, film and music producers, and singers.

 André Evans, MA, MFT focuses much of his practice treating clients experiencing emotional complexity and psychological challenges comprising of anxiety-related, depression, emotional (mood) disorders, family and marital conflict, intrusive thoughts that cause distress, life transitions, relationship issues, stress-related problems, and social challenges; while gaining a specialization trauma in post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Mr. Evans is now expanding his practice to Orange County, California.

Official Website
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Anxiety

Beating Anxiety

There are some easy tools that anyone can use to cope with their feelings of anxiety. They include:

1. Learning more about anxiety: This will help you to understand what is happening when you start to feel increasingly anxious. Fist, remember that we all feel anxious at time. It can help us to prepare for and cope with hard tasks- such as sitting an exam or teaching a class. However, it leads to problems when the danger isn't real yet our body is signaling a high state of alert.

2. Learning Strategies that help us Relax: The two most common strategies for relaxing and unwinding are calming down our breathing and muscle relaxation. The former involves taking slow, gentle breaths (breathing in through the nose, pausing for a few seconds, then breathing out slowly through the mouth, again). The latter involves learning how to tense and relax the different muscles - and then repeating this until our stress levels fall.

3. Actively challenging our anxious thoughts: When we're anxious and tense we often see the world as a threatening and hostile place. This usually reflects faulty, negative thinking where we jump to conclusions or expect the worse to happen. This is out of proportion, exaggerated thinking which is unrealistic - and makes us feel uptight. A strategy for helping is replacing faulty thinking with a more realistic and accurate approach. This necessitates us challenging our automatic thinking so we see things in a clearer, less distressing way. Of Course, it takes practice and effort to shift or change anxious thinking - but it's worth the effort in the end.

4. Facing our fears: One of the best ways of dealing with our fears is exposing ourselves to what makes us feel afraid. For example, if you avoid being with people as this leaves you feeling anxious then the best way forward is to simply face your fear. You could make a list that goes from "least to most scary" - and then reward yourself each time you move a level up the list.

Rape

Every 1 in 4 women are raped

National Eating Disorders Awareness Week

February 24 – March 2, 2013

National Eating Disorders Awareness Week

Held annually during National Eating Disorders Awareness Week, NEDA educates and screens for eating disorders and connects those at-risk with local resources. Many people struggle with the way they look or how they feel about their bodies, with one out of three normal dieters progressing to pathological dieting. In the United States, as many as 10 million females and 1 million males are fighting a life and death battle with an eating disorder, which has one of the highest mortality rates of any mental illness. http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/programs-events/nedawareness-week.php

Self Harm/Injury Awareness Day

March 1 is Self Harm/Injury Awareness Day.

Wear Orange or an Orange Ribbon. Write "Keep Fighting" on your Wrist or Draw an Orange Butterfly. 

Self-Harm

People think self harm is about trying to kill yourself. But mostly it's about tying NOT to kill yourself. 

It's an attempt to deal with powerful painful emotions. And even though there are other ways to try to cope; stopping self harm is actually pretty complicated.

 So before we go blaming someone for harming themselves, maybe we can help. By not judging. By understanding that underneath the cuts, etc. there is pain. A lot of it. And by understanding how incredibly hard it is to stop self harm once it's begun.

Suicide - A major, preventable Mental Health Problem 

Q: How common is Suicide in children and teens? 
A: In 2009, suicide was the third leading cause of death for young people ages 15-24. In this age group, suicide accounted for 14.4 percent of all death in 2009. 

While these numbers may makes suicide seem common, it is important to realize that suicide and suicidal behavior are not healthy or typical responses to stress. 

Q: What are some of the risk factors for suicide? 
A: Risk factors vary with age, gender, or ethnic group. They may occur in combination or change over time. Some important risk factors are: 

- Depression and other mental disorders 
- Substance abuse disorder (often in combination with other mental disorders)
- Prior Suicide Attempt 
- Family history of Suicide 
- Family violence including physical or sexual abuse
- Firearms in the home 
- Incarceration
- Exposure to suicidal behavior of others, such as family members or peers

However, it is important to notes that many people who have these risk factors are not suicidal. 

Q: What are signs to look for? 
A: The following are some of the signs you might notice in yourself or a friend that may be reason for concern. 

- Talking about wanting to die or to kill oneself
- Looking for a way to kill oneself, such as searching online or buying a gun
- Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live
- Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain
- Talking about being a burden to others 
- Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs 
- Acting anxious or agitated; behaving recklessly
- Sleeping too little or too much 
- Withdrawing or feeling isolated
- Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge
- Displaying extreme mood swings

Seeking help is a sign of strength, if you are concerned, go with your instincts and get help. 

Q: What can I do for myself or someone else? 
A: If you are concerned, immediate action is very important. Suicide can be prevented and most people who feel suicidal demonstrate warning signs. Recognizing some of these warning signs is the first step in helping yourself or someone you care about.

If you are in a crisis and need help: Call this toll free number available 24 hours a day, every day 
1-800-273- TALK(8255).