I found this article very interesting and wanted to share it with my readers:
A healthy relationship is based on two people wanting to be together. Two people who are equally committed to the relationship and making it work. An unequal commitment will likely result in one person feeling trapped or manipulated, and the other person feeling insecure.
By forming a relationship with someone just because they convinced you that you should be with them, you are giving away your power. Being with someone you do not genuinely want to be with, is allowing them to make your choice, even though you know deep down it’s not the right choice for you. That is not the recipe for a healthy relationship, or for happiness.
Alternatively, if you know, or even suspect that your partner is in the relationship because you have persuaded or manipulated them into being with you, you will never feel secure. No matter how good you are at keeping someone with you, if you know on some level that they might rather be elsewhere, your life will be spent fearing the moment they summon the courage to leave.
Knowing that we would be happier in a healthy relationship, what makes us form relationships that are based on such an unhealthy imbalance?
Being persuaded to be in a relationship is a sign that you are not taking responsibility for your own decisions and happiness. You are giving up control over a big part of your life, and allowing others to decide what you should do, even though you know in your heart that this is not what you want.
Sometimes we allow others to control our lives because we are too afraid to take responsibility for our own choices. If I go along with what you want and it doesn’t work out, then it is clearly your fault not mine. But if I am bold, and go for what I really want, and then it fails, that means I have failed.
Sometimes, we have become so used to listening to what other people think we should do, we have forgotten how to listen to our inner voices, or have allowed them to be drowned out. If your choices as a child were criticized as being inappropriate or just plain wrong, you may have accepted the fact that you really don’t know what’s best for you.
This is not true! You are, in fact, the only person who knows what’s best for you. You just need to learn to listen to yourself and drown out the loud voices of others insisting that they know best. If you have been used to going along with what other people think is best for you, making choices for yourself can be daunting. I suggest you start with small decisions first. Try thinking about what you want to eat for dinner, and then expressing that wish loud and clear, instead of your usual ‘whatever you want is fine.’
Once you have mastered the art of expressing your small desires, and feeling the satisfaction of having them met, you can build up to bigger choices.
Slowly developing the ability to think about what you really want, and then going about having it, is a vital skill in creating both happiness and a healthy relationship.
What if the shoe is on the other foot and you are the one who is convincing a reluctant partner to be with you? This type of approach to a relationship is almost always based on fear. We may fear that if we don’t attach ourselves immediately to the first person who comes along and shows a minimal interest in us, then we may ‘end up alone.’
We may also believe that having the upper hand in the relationship, and being the ‘stronger’ partner gives us control. This is untrue. Trying to control another person never gives you control. It is an illusion to think that you can truly control anyone else. The only thing that is really within our control is the way we respond to situations in our lives.
It is doing yourself a great disservice to be with someone who does not wholeheartedly want to be with you or whom you do not wholeheartedly want to be with. You deserve more. You deserve a healthy relationship with someone you really want to be with and who really wants to be with you.
Be patient. There is someone out there who will want to be with you just as much as you will want to be with them!
Source: http://www.choosing-life-my-way.com/healthy-relationship.html
Monday, May 14, 2012
Thursday, May 3, 2012
The Science Behind Infatuation
Science Has An Answer For Infatuation!
Research has confirmed the existence of an amphetamine-like chemical which is rapidly activated (like lightning!) when we begin to feel attracted to someone. This chemical is called phenylethylamine (PEA), that famous substance that makes laboratory rats press levers until they drop dead from exhaustion.
Diane Ackerman, author of The Nature of Love and A Natural History of the Senses, describes PEA as a "molecule that speeds up the flow of information between nerve cells", whipping the brain into a frenzy of excitement, sending ordinary attraction into overdrive and providing the assertive oomph! needed to take social risks and overcome any obstacles to mating. We can consider this a well-designed molecule from the point of view of species survival.
But... some other researchers at the New York State Psychiatric Institute claim to have discovered that PEA has a tendency to pave the way for that peculiar contemporary disorder, The Relationship Addiction. They point out that this internally-generated infatuation drug acts a lot like speed. Some people (and a lot of rats) not used to the rush begin to crave it.
In other words, some people are always infatuated, but not necessarily with the same person, and not long enough to develop a relationship that makes them really happy or leads to lasting happiness.
Is this what it means to be A Fool For Love? A Fool for Phenylethylamine? By many indications, once we are pierced by the arrow of attraction, the biologically compelling quality of infatuation insures for many people a helpless emotional state.
Psychology Has An Answer for Infatuation!
Biological models explain a lot about the "how" of infatuation, the mechanism governing the actual phenomenology of love foolishness. The social sciences have a lot to tell us about the "why". Why this particular man, why that woman?
Naturally, Freud would have said that it is all in your head. What else? His most profound contribution to modern thought was to show us the extent to which our behavior, especially our love behavior, is guided by unconscious processes. He might further have emphasized that we are attracted (compelled?) to experience specific relationships in an attempt to meet intimacy needs shaped in our earliest years, with our first love objects: Mom and Dad. (Just the basic meat and potatoes of attraction dynamics, folks!)
Carl Jung popularized the idea that opposites attract, and for very good reasons. He theorized that we are unconsciously drawn to those who exhibit qualities we find lacking - or somehow undeveloped - in our own psyches and that we always seek to complete or balance ourselves somehow through intimate attachments. In the state of infatuation, then, we are pulled like a moth toward the flame we wish to acquire for our permanent warmth.
The Imago Model of Infatuation
Harville Hendrix, author of Keeping the Love You Find: A Guide For Singles, has one of the best explanations I’ve heard for why we tend to fall so heavily and helplessly, if sometimes so briefly, into the infatuated state.
He says we each have in our memory banks a highly individual imprint, a mental construct called an imago, in which the best and worst attributes of our earliest caretakers have been crystallized.
The imago we have of our dream lover is like an intimacy template. It influences and filters our perception so that we are particularly attentive and sensitized to those who match our private patterns. This then accounts for the highly specific nature of our infatuations.
Dr. Hendrix thinks we have something like psychic receptor-sites for certain people who evoke highly idiosyncratic responses in us. He argues - as do many others - that we are unconsciously attracted to people who help us recreate early relationship dynamics in the (also unconscious) hope that things will turn out better and we will have a lot more control this time around.
The perception of strong attraction then acts as an internal signal which flips the PEA switch (remember the infatuation drug?). Apparently, such attraction is relatively involuntary, primitively-driven, and seemingly beyond our control. Just like the drug itself.
Good News/Bad News
The deeper we go into this matter, the more infatuation seems to reflect its dictionary definition as the epitome of foolishness. The experience seems to take conscious choice right out of the picture. When we are infatuated with someone - or something - it is as though we become little love robots, biochemical puppets with no will of our own, without a rational thought in our heads! And what is the stupendous pay-off for what seems to be a love offering of mindless surrender?
Answer truthfully, now: How often have you experienced highly erotic and deeply gratifying love-making with someone with whom you were infatuated? How often has the object of your feverish desire turned out to be as you imagined him or her? How many smoldering, day-dreamed passions have actually burst into flame for you? How many times have you been a Fool For Love only to realize within weeks (if you are lucky) or months that there was no love there, only helpless yearning? How many sunny, companionable days have you actually spent with someone you worshipped and longed to possess? In short, how many times has infatuation worked for you?
The answers to these questions will tell you there is little happiness in infatuation itself, precious little daily satisfaction is possible while we are acting the Fool For Love. That is because the state of infatuation thrives on distance and frustration. It flourishes under difficult circumstances. It is not magnified by consummation and familiarity.
Please note: Infatuation cannot exceed its own expectations. It is the spark and the emotional kindling, not a steady, warming fire. It is an appetizer that makes you anticipate the full banquet. But it will not keep you warm and it will not fill you up.
Infatuation begins as an important emotional signal to point you in the direction of desire and get you moving. But it is not yet love and its impetus will never take the place of thinking about what you want and acting persistently on that intention.
Still and all... there is no reason to throw the baby out with the bathwater!
Transcendental Infatuation
When all is said and done, we will always want to fall in love with the pull of a potent attraction. We will always want to love infatuation and we will always reserve our right to be a Fool For Love. And that is as it should be. Who does not want to feel moved by the thrill of a profound, mysterious attraction that is able to overpower our ego defenses and cause us to open our soul to another with the impetuosity of a child? The state of infatuation is so powerful that we want infatuation to have a meaning beyond that of a chemically-induced trance phenomenon. And that is possible, but with just one little catch.
In order to make certain that infatuation can fulfill its true role in the natural discovery and growth of love, we have to stay semi-conscious and aware of our choices. Only conscious surrender and sustained attachment can make the original spark of infatuation eventually work to our benefit.
Research has confirmed the existence of an amphetamine-like chemical which is rapidly activated (like lightning!) when we begin to feel attracted to someone. This chemical is called phenylethylamine (PEA), that famous substance that makes laboratory rats press levers until they drop dead from exhaustion.
Diane Ackerman, author of The Nature of Love and A Natural History of the Senses, describes PEA as a "molecule that speeds up the flow of information between nerve cells", whipping the brain into a frenzy of excitement, sending ordinary attraction into overdrive and providing the assertive oomph! needed to take social risks and overcome any obstacles to mating. We can consider this a well-designed molecule from the point of view of species survival.
But... some other researchers at the New York State Psychiatric Institute claim to have discovered that PEA has a tendency to pave the way for that peculiar contemporary disorder, The Relationship Addiction. They point out that this internally-generated infatuation drug acts a lot like speed. Some people (and a lot of rats) not used to the rush begin to crave it.
In other words, some people are always infatuated, but not necessarily with the same person, and not long enough to develop a relationship that makes them really happy or leads to lasting happiness.
Is this what it means to be A Fool For Love? A Fool for Phenylethylamine? By many indications, once we are pierced by the arrow of attraction, the biologically compelling quality of infatuation insures for many people a helpless emotional state.
Psychology Has An Answer for Infatuation!
Biological models explain a lot about the "how" of infatuation, the mechanism governing the actual phenomenology of love foolishness. The social sciences have a lot to tell us about the "why". Why this particular man, why that woman?
Naturally, Freud would have said that it is all in your head. What else? His most profound contribution to modern thought was to show us the extent to which our behavior, especially our love behavior, is guided by unconscious processes. He might further have emphasized that we are attracted (compelled?) to experience specific relationships in an attempt to meet intimacy needs shaped in our earliest years, with our first love objects: Mom and Dad. (Just the basic meat and potatoes of attraction dynamics, folks!)
Carl Jung popularized the idea that opposites attract, and for very good reasons. He theorized that we are unconsciously drawn to those who exhibit qualities we find lacking - or somehow undeveloped - in our own psyches and that we always seek to complete or balance ourselves somehow through intimate attachments. In the state of infatuation, then, we are pulled like a moth toward the flame we wish to acquire for our permanent warmth.
The Imago Model of Infatuation
Harville Hendrix, author of Keeping the Love You Find: A Guide For Singles, has one of the best explanations I’ve heard for why we tend to fall so heavily and helplessly, if sometimes so briefly, into the infatuated state.
He says we each have in our memory banks a highly individual imprint, a mental construct called an imago, in which the best and worst attributes of our earliest caretakers have been crystallized.
The imago we have of our dream lover is like an intimacy template. It influences and filters our perception so that we are particularly attentive and sensitized to those who match our private patterns. This then accounts for the highly specific nature of our infatuations.
Dr. Hendrix thinks we have something like psychic receptor-sites for certain people who evoke highly idiosyncratic responses in us. He argues - as do many others - that we are unconsciously attracted to people who help us recreate early relationship dynamics in the (also unconscious) hope that things will turn out better and we will have a lot more control this time around.
The perception of strong attraction then acts as an internal signal which flips the PEA switch (remember the infatuation drug?). Apparently, such attraction is relatively involuntary, primitively-driven, and seemingly beyond our control. Just like the drug itself.
Good News/Bad News
The deeper we go into this matter, the more infatuation seems to reflect its dictionary definition as the epitome of foolishness. The experience seems to take conscious choice right out of the picture. When we are infatuated with someone - or something - it is as though we become little love robots, biochemical puppets with no will of our own, without a rational thought in our heads! And what is the stupendous pay-off for what seems to be a love offering of mindless surrender?
Answer truthfully, now: How often have you experienced highly erotic and deeply gratifying love-making with someone with whom you were infatuated? How often has the object of your feverish desire turned out to be as you imagined him or her? How many smoldering, day-dreamed passions have actually burst into flame for you? How many times have you been a Fool For Love only to realize within weeks (if you are lucky) or months that there was no love there, only helpless yearning? How many sunny, companionable days have you actually spent with someone you worshipped and longed to possess? In short, how many times has infatuation worked for you?
The answers to these questions will tell you there is little happiness in infatuation itself, precious little daily satisfaction is possible while we are acting the Fool For Love. That is because the state of infatuation thrives on distance and frustration. It flourishes under difficult circumstances. It is not magnified by consummation and familiarity.
Please note: Infatuation cannot exceed its own expectations. It is the spark and the emotional kindling, not a steady, warming fire. It is an appetizer that makes you anticipate the full banquet. But it will not keep you warm and it will not fill you up.
Infatuation begins as an important emotional signal to point you in the direction of desire and get you moving. But it is not yet love and its impetus will never take the place of thinking about what you want and acting persistently on that intention.
Still and all... there is no reason to throw the baby out with the bathwater!
Transcendental Infatuation
When all is said and done, we will always want to fall in love with the pull of a potent attraction. We will always want to love infatuation and we will always reserve our right to be a Fool For Love. And that is as it should be. Who does not want to feel moved by the thrill of a profound, mysterious attraction that is able to overpower our ego defenses and cause us to open our soul to another with the impetuosity of a child? The state of infatuation is so powerful that we want infatuation to have a meaning beyond that of a chemically-induced trance phenomenon. And that is possible, but with just one little catch.
In order to make certain that infatuation can fulfill its true role in the natural discovery and growth of love, we have to stay semi-conscious and aware of our choices. Only conscious surrender and sustained attachment can make the original spark of infatuation eventually work to our benefit.
Advise before Bed...
Don't make a decisions before you have a complete understanding of things.
*My Words, My Canvas*
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Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Discharged
Two of my client's were discharged successfully today. I hope and pray that they continue to do well and prosper in life. I will miss one in particular. He had been at the facility for three months when everyone was about to give up on him and send him to another secured facility. I stood up for him and said, "I can work with him." My Director gave me 30 days to turn this kid around. It was hard at times, disappointing and in the end very rewarding. Nine months later ...He left today, successfully. I will miss seeing him.
*My Words, My Canvas*
*My Words, My Canvas*
Rambles at 5am!
Every week it amazes me on what I learn, usually its a life lesson. After each month usually on the first or second of the new month, I sit back and look at the life lesson learned the previous month. I usually don't share these thought however I believe expression is important in a persons life. Last month I realized how quickly a person/situation can change. "Everything can change in a blink of an eye." Let's see what I learn this month let alone this week.
*My Words, My Canvas*
*My Words, My Canvas*
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Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Advise of the day !
God will eventually call you back. Start living life with no regrets. Take chances!
*My Words, My Canvas*
Published with Blogger-droid v2.0.4
Monday, April 30, 2012
Interesting Concept
My director said to me today: A relationship is like a coin, Two sides, heads and tails, polar opposites yet still one coin.
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Saturday, April 28, 2012
Monday, April 23, 2012
Stages of Infatuation
Dear Readers,
This is a continuation of the Infatuation segment. I found it interesting that as I was writing my last piece my sister was going through one of the stages of Infatuation.
Infatuation Phase I:
Stricken! The first act in the life of an infatuation is that magic moment when someone suddenly takes on "special" meaning for us. You hear a phrase or a particular inflection in someone’s voice that strikes a chord in your heart. You are struck by the exact tilt of his head. You are warmed by a gaze or an unexpected tenderness. An intriguing remark goes straight to your soul. Or, perhaps from a respectable distance, you notice legs or skin or hair (or a more private physical trait) to die for. Lightning has struck.
Infatuation Phase II:
Intrusive Thinking After the bolt of lightning comes a storm of intrusive thinking about the desired one. Every experience you now have seems interwoven with their qualities, every shared moment weighted with new meaning. When apart from them,you review and relish each moment spent in their presence and ruminate on their flavor. In fact, many infatuation informants report spending 80 to 100 percent of their time compulsively trying to crystallize the vision of their new love,living in vigilant expectation of the next contact.
Infatuation Phase III:
Idealization Early in the intrusive thinking phase, idealization sets in. The erotic sizzle permeates everything and creates that famous halo with which we love to blind ourselves. For a while, the infatuee sees no flaws in the beloved and admits to no blocks to forward progress.
Infatuation Phase IV:
The Emotional Rollercoaster From this high intensity anticipation comes the primary emotional dynamic of infatuation: an exquisite combination of hope and uncertainty which has funded libraries of poetry. At this point, life becomes that famous rollercoaster ride: precious moments of delightful reciprocity (real or imagined) followed by agonizing doubts of ultimate success. Infatuation is now more consciously driven by simple fear. In fact, The Nagging Fear of Not Getting What You Have Begun to Desire is the unique torment reserved for the infatuated elite. This pattern of human experience is as well-documented as any emotional experience has ever been. You can find poignant elaborations on the process incised upon clay tablets, etched in marble, painted on papyrus, fixed in celluloid, playing on the radio, and filtering through the voices all around you. It is a famous and favorite form of anguish. But how can something so uncomfortable be so irresistible?
Tomorrow I will post a brief overview about what the sciences say about Infatuation.
Take care all!
*My Words, My Canvas*
This is a continuation of the Infatuation segment. I found it interesting that as I was writing my last piece my sister was going through one of the stages of Infatuation.
Infatuation Phase I:
Stricken! The first act in the life of an infatuation is that magic moment when someone suddenly takes on "special" meaning for us. You hear a phrase or a particular inflection in someone’s voice that strikes a chord in your heart. You are struck by the exact tilt of his head. You are warmed by a gaze or an unexpected tenderness. An intriguing remark goes straight to your soul. Or, perhaps from a respectable distance, you notice legs or skin or hair (or a more private physical trait) to die for. Lightning has struck.
Infatuation Phase II:
Intrusive Thinking After the bolt of lightning comes a storm of intrusive thinking about the desired one. Every experience you now have seems interwoven with their qualities, every shared moment weighted with new meaning. When apart from them,you review and relish each moment spent in their presence and ruminate on their flavor. In fact, many infatuation informants report spending 80 to 100 percent of their time compulsively trying to crystallize the vision of their new love,living in vigilant expectation of the next contact.
Infatuation Phase III:
Idealization Early in the intrusive thinking phase, idealization sets in. The erotic sizzle permeates everything and creates that famous halo with which we love to blind ourselves. For a while, the infatuee sees no flaws in the beloved and admits to no blocks to forward progress.
Infatuation Phase IV:
The Emotional Rollercoaster From this high intensity anticipation comes the primary emotional dynamic of infatuation: an exquisite combination of hope and uncertainty which has funded libraries of poetry. At this point, life becomes that famous rollercoaster ride: precious moments of delightful reciprocity (real or imagined) followed by agonizing doubts of ultimate success. Infatuation is now more consciously driven by simple fear. In fact, The Nagging Fear of Not Getting What You Have Begun to Desire is the unique torment reserved for the infatuated elite. This pattern of human experience is as well-documented as any emotional experience has ever been. You can find poignant elaborations on the process incised upon clay tablets, etched in marble, painted on papyrus, fixed in celluloid, playing on the radio, and filtering through the voices all around you. It is a famous and favorite form of anguish. But how can something so uncomfortable be so irresistible?
Tomorrow I will post a brief overview about what the sciences say about Infatuation.
Take care all!
*My Words, My Canvas*
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Friday, April 20, 2012
Infatuation
Dear Readers,
Over the next couple of days I will be writing a segment on Infatuation. I experienced this last year and it took me a while to get over it. I believe that Infatuation can consume us and really affect us in negative ways. For example, infatuation with a past relationship can prevent us from moving on in our current relationships.
To provide you a little background information on my circumstance: Last year, after breaking up with the boyfriend around mother’s day I was crushed. I took my time and attempted to get over him but just couldn't do it. I even attempted to go on a couple of dates.
This is an excerpt from one of my diary entries: A few months later and a dozen people later I still don't feel anything. Numb is what I can describe it as. I know I will never find the same connection. Someone who knows what's wrong as soon as they hear you say hello. And wise versa. I know that I will never feel for someone else how I did feel for him. I will never have what I had. I understand these things yet I wish I did have what I had. I wish I could find what I had. I wish what I had, never left. The key word wish doesn't mean anything. Because wishes only come true in Disney movies. I live in the real world. I sat down and read all my diary entries from when I had what I wish I still had and they are full of such joy and love. I never fell out of love with what I had. In the end, it is what it is...life is a bitch. But I still want and pray for what I had. I love him.
Several month after I wrote the blog I received a text from my ex. Without divulging too much information after reading the text I realized that I was never really in love with him at all. His text reminded me all the reasons why I broke up with him in the first place. I was obsessing and infatuated with the connection we had, that no other guy had given me since. I would never give anyone a chance. If I wasn't feeling the connection I would automatically get rid of the guy in less than an hour or a week. I continued to compare that connection to every single guy until a close friend of mine said, "STOP IT! You will never have that same connection ever again! BUT you might find an even better one! You just have to give a person time and be patient!" She then continued to yell at me and stated, “How long did it take you to build that connection?” I said, “Instant” she then stated, “Did the connection get better?” I stated, “Yeah it took 4 months but it grew stronger.” She then stated, “So it still took time right? Give people time!” Let me tell you after being yelled at and also given a reality check I realized I wasn't being fair to the guy(s) or to myself. I was torturing myself!
To all my readers please don’t do what I did. Write off every guy because he wasn’t my ex. If you with someone now be fair to that person and build your relationship. Let it reach greatness. Let it reach that true potential. If you recently broke it off with someone because of your infatuation with the past and have realized it was the wrong decision let that person know you’re sorry and that you still love them. It’s never too late to start over. It would be a tragedy to give up and never start over at all.
Tomorrow I will write a post on the stages of Infatuation.
*My Words, My Canvas*
Over the next couple of days I will be writing a segment on Infatuation. I experienced this last year and it took me a while to get over it. I believe that Infatuation can consume us and really affect us in negative ways. For example, infatuation with a past relationship can prevent us from moving on in our current relationships.
To provide you a little background information on my circumstance: Last year, after breaking up with the boyfriend around mother’s day I was crushed. I took my time and attempted to get over him but just couldn't do it. I even attempted to go on a couple of dates.
This is an excerpt from one of my diary entries: A few months later and a dozen people later I still don't feel anything. Numb is what I can describe it as. I know I will never find the same connection. Someone who knows what's wrong as soon as they hear you say hello. And wise versa. I know that I will never feel for someone else how I did feel for him. I will never have what I had. I understand these things yet I wish I did have what I had. I wish I could find what I had. I wish what I had, never left. The key word wish doesn't mean anything. Because wishes only come true in Disney movies. I live in the real world. I sat down and read all my diary entries from when I had what I wish I still had and they are full of such joy and love. I never fell out of love with what I had. In the end, it is what it is...life is a bitch. But I still want and pray for what I had. I love him.
Several month after I wrote the blog I received a text from my ex. Without divulging too much information after reading the text I realized that I was never really in love with him at all. His text reminded me all the reasons why I broke up with him in the first place. I was obsessing and infatuated with the connection we had, that no other guy had given me since. I would never give anyone a chance. If I wasn't feeling the connection I would automatically get rid of the guy in less than an hour or a week. I continued to compare that connection to every single guy until a close friend of mine said, "STOP IT! You will never have that same connection ever again! BUT you might find an even better one! You just have to give a person time and be patient!" She then continued to yell at me and stated, “How long did it take you to build that connection?” I said, “Instant” she then stated, “Did the connection get better?” I stated, “Yeah it took 4 months but it grew stronger.” She then stated, “So it still took time right? Give people time!” Let me tell you after being yelled at and also given a reality check I realized I wasn't being fair to the guy(s) or to myself. I was torturing myself!
To all my readers please don’t do what I did. Write off every guy because he wasn’t my ex. If you with someone now be fair to that person and build your relationship. Let it reach greatness. Let it reach that true potential. If you recently broke it off with someone because of your infatuation with the past and have realized it was the wrong decision let that person know you’re sorry and that you still love them. It’s never too late to start over. It would be a tragedy to give up and never start over at all.
Tomorrow I will write a post on the stages of Infatuation.
*My Words, My Canvas*
Monday, April 16, 2012
Quote Before Bed...
Nothing hurts more than realizing he meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to him.
*My Words, My Canvas*
*My Words, My Canvas*
Thinking/Typing Out Loud!
1) Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go that makes us stronger.
2) You will never know true happiness until you have truly loved, and you will never understand what pain really is until you have lost it.
3) If your love does not work with that person it just means that someone else loves your more.
4) Some of the biggest challenges in realtionships comes from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: They're trying to find someone who's going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your realtionship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take.
*My Words, My Canvas*
Quote of The Day...
So many people walk around with a meaningless life. They seem half-asleep, even when they're busy doing things they think are important. This is because they're chasing the wrong things. The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.
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