This time it is different. Honestly, I am trying so hard but each time something goes wrong. I am constantly reminded that I am a fuck up. I am told things that make me feel bad. Never have I cried this much. Never have I ever been this depressed. My move to Texas seems like the biggest mistake of my life. Each day has been complete torture. I don't know who I am anymore. I have started to doubt myself, doubt my existence. When I imagined my life at 27 I thought things would be different. I thought I would be happy. Funny today someone said to me, its hard to make you smile. I replied with, my smile has disappeared. He responded with, "I can see that." I can walk around and fake a great smile, but it's hard knowing how hurt you really are on the inside. I try to be strong, I try to fight. I understand it would get worse. But when it's been bad for so long you think to yourself ...man I am ready to give up!
*My Thoughts, My Canvas*
You exist!
ReplyDeleteYou help people. You make them realize hope when all they have is despair.
Not all of us are perfect! That's reality. It's true that situations and people define who we are. The truth is that only you define who you are.
So be strong and let the sun shine in.
Thank you so much! =)
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