I Will Be Heard...

I always thought speaking up was a good thing. I mean how can it be such a bad thing? Am I so wrong to voice my opinions, my thoughts, and my feelings? Am I so wrong to say something when I think you are out of line? Am I so wrong to tell the waiter/waitress that my soup is cold or my coke is flat? Am I so wrong to get angry when a car does not stop at his stop sign and almost causes a huge accident that could have been avoided if he/she would just have followed the rules? What would have happened? He/she might have to wait three seconds or less for someone to pass and be three more seconds late to pick up the prostitute on the corner so he can finally pay to get laid.

I know you shouldn’t say things when you’re angry but I am furious. Very furious. I have this vain popping out in the middle of my forehead and it just won’t go away. I know it’s not a pretty picture.

It is frustrating when you find out that the person you thought knew you well and have known each other for over 15 years gets mad at you for speaking up. Seriously, did you think I wasn’t going to say anything? Through all those years, when have I not spoken up? It is how I am. I will speak up. I will speak up when you and I are walking down the street and a car is recklessly backing up and half an inch from you. I will speak up when our lives are in danger. I will speak up if I disagree. I will speak up if I cannot hear you. I will speak up if I am not feeling well. I will speak up when you give me a reason not to trust you.

People are not mind readers, I WILL SPEAK UP, I WILL BE HEARD, whether you like it or not. If you don’t like it, then please get the fuck out of my life. I DO NOT PLAN ON CHANGING.

*My Words, My Canvas*

10 Things...

Repeat your sentences in your head before you verbalize it. Simply because I will call you on it. Especially if you already irritate me and the level of my respect towards you staggers from zero to intolerant.

My Pet Peeves:
1. Stupid comments – yes there are such things and no I refuse to subscribe to the saying that there are no such things as stupid comments and/or questions.

2. Placing on hold – No you can’t call me and say “Let me put you on hold to pick up the other line.” I will hang up on you. My time is important to me. So don’t waste it.

3. Shallow - Get over yourself. Your skin will eventually sag one day.

4. Better than… – No, you are not better than 100% of the human population.

5. When I am around you I need attention – If I don't get it, trust me I can easily find someone else who will give me the attention I deserve.

6. Promises…. – when you make a promise. KEEP it!

7. One upper – Fuck you and your better story. I am telling you mine and I need to be heard. You can show off when the spot light is on you. Right now it’s my turn

8. Last second – Let me clarify something….I am not Option B. I have never been secondary nor will I ever be a back up plan.

9. Liars - Just tell the truth, why even waste your time by thinking of one? Grow some balls, tell it how it is.

10. Excuse me, what? - Seriously, nothing is more irritating then someone who does not listen and pretends that they were. Then they say something completely off topic. Start paying attention to words, or else leave me the fuck alone!

*My Words, My Canvas*

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

And Beauty Was Her Name...

Dialogue:
Person one: Wow, look at her! I wish I could be that pretty.
Person two: Look again oh grasshopper, her beauty just appears on the outside. She lacks the beauty within.

The point: Beauty is more then just a pretty face. Beauty is a package of personality, values, character, brains, and respect for your self but most important for others. I believe that no one in this world should have the nerve to label others as pretty or ugly. Each of us has something very different and unique attached to ourselves. Find it, don't diminish it.

*My Words, My Canvas*

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Unimportance

I absolutely hate that feeling. You know feelings of unimportance. The feeling is very broad and can be applied to many different situations. Most of us do not care about the feelings of unimportance when applied to certain situation, for example: meeting strangers. The situation I would like to pick on for the blog topic today is, when you are on the phone with another person and they are pre-occupied with other things. The person keeps saying, “sorry I was _____ what did you say?” Honestly people, if you are busy then just tell the person, “hey I am busy right now, do you mind or can I call you back later?” On the other hand, yes there are those individuals who enjoy it when the other person on the line is engaged in another activity besides talking to them. They find it entertaining. To each their own. It never really bothered me. In fact I use to do that to people when I was on the phone. It irritated them and I did not understand why. Now as I grow, develop, learn, and get older I understand what they were experiencing and going through when I was doing that. It is rude and does not validate an individual. It is frustrating. I would like to keep this short and brief. I cannot go on about this topic for long.

In closing: Stop, say your busy, talk later!

Thank you!
*My Words, My Canvas*

Paths

There is a lot going through my mind, I cannot help but take time out from my slumber to get my words down tonight.

There comes a point in our lives where we one day have to say, "stop this is not the right path for me." I've finally come to realization that because of the recent events that have occurred in my life, have influenced me to take the wrong steps in life.

The feeling was great while it lasted, but slowly I felt it disappear from the other side. Maybe its just my imagination, but my instincts have never been wrong before, and I don't think they will let me down this time. If indeed my instinct is wrong and the path that feels wrong is the right path, I sure do hope that while on this journey a few side markers would show up letting me know I'll be okay.

Is a little reassurance good or bad? I think everything is great in limitation ...but someone like myself never needs neither has needed that reassurance. I don't plan on starting now. Then why ask for side markers? Isn't that a type of reassurance that tells a person that they are traveling on the correct path?

I don't have an answer, but one day I will. We don't always have the answer to questions right away. It's a process that us interpersonal/interpersonal minds love to go through.

For now, at this current moment those side markers are a symbol. My own personal symbols. Each one says, "K your doing alright, now get to the next side marker."

For those who are extremely confused about this blog, its ok. Not everyone will understand my babble tonight. For those who understood my words, now can somewhat understand me, but not fully.

*My Words, My Canvas*

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Wish...

If I had one wish, I would want to be a robot so I can't feel emotions. Or I can go back to being that cold hearted bitch I used to be. Since this isn't a Disney movie and wishes never come true, I choose option number two.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.2

Shut Up and Kiss Me!

There are many different kissing styles. Individuals do not realize that, nobody does it the same. Kissing styles add “flavor” to every relationship and reveal more than we think. At one point in time we have all experienced the soft but electric kiss, the hard kiss of passion, the kiss where you take in each other’s breath, and the gentle bite on the lip from someone begging to be “rode hard.” The differences are important, because they can tell you about your relationship. The mushy kiss, the quick peck, the sloppy kiss, the rigid tongued kiss, the smothering kiss, and the impatient kiss. What do all these type of kiss actually mean?

Well, the mushy kiss is usually limp and lacks passion and eroticism. The quick peck is often given when an individual is in a hurry; the sloppy kiss triggers anger rather than desire, the rigid tonged kiss classifies your partner as a mechanical lover, the smothering kiss means that he or she rekindles childhood fears of an intrusive parent, and finally the impatient kiss implies your partner is preoccupied with more important things.

Another important aspect of kissing individuals should pay attention to is hand placement. Where are your partner’s (or your) hands? Do you gently touch each other’s face while kissing? Does your hand softly stroke the back of your partner’s neck? Often couples do not put effort into this. They do not stop and ask there partner what they like and do not like. Do not ignore the little things because they are all a part of an elusive language.

Kissing reveals more than we realize, it reflects intimacy, sex, love, and our personal history. Even a simple kiss can keep that passion alive.

*My Words, My Canvas*

Keep Your Options Open Little Timmy

“Always keep your options open,” I would often find myself saying that line to teens/friends that would come to me for relationship advice. The reason why I would give this piece of advice to people is because of the simple fact that I was a firm believer in that motto.

You are taught at a very young age to, “Keep your options open.” You might be wondering when this has happened? I will give you an example, you have received your SAT score and are getting ready to apply to colleges. Your parents and or counselor says, pick at least three school's, one being the one you can’t get into, second the one you want to get into, and third the one you can get into. Another example I want to share, when you are applying for a job, “keep your options open,” do not apply just to one place, apply to many, interview, the more the better.

When does this motto apply to relationships? Is it when you are single and just dating? Or when your single, speaking to someone you potentially can see yourself with but aren’t sure? Or do you keep your options open when you’re just tired of the person you are with and need a backup? For those of you who do not know what a backup is, the best way I can explain it, when you need someone to fall back on when your number one pick doesn’t work out there is always number two.

My next question is when does the “keep your options open” motto end? Is there an age limit that applies? As you get older does this change? Personally, I think this does change as you get older. As you grow and seek higher education, your field tends to get narrower. You only then start to apply to jobs where you have specialized in. You keep your options open, meaning, you apply to different places where you specialization can be put to work.

As I get older, when it comes to speaking to someone I am genuinely interested in I do not, will not, and refuse to keep my options open. Trust me, I was never like this. Overtime, you slowly realize that after dating “the wrong ones” for so long your list of requirements, your wants become narrower. And when you find someone who meets the requirements on that narrow list of yours, you do not want to waste your time going through wrong ones, when you have the right one. When someone has my interest I will stop communicating with the “maybes,” I will get rid of them and also I would not use any social networking sites (dating sites). I want to and will give 100%.

Call it dumb or whatever you want, overtime, you might understand my perspective. If you do not understand it right now, you don’t have to agree with me ...because after all this is:

*My Words, My Canvas*

Charlie I HATE you!!

I don’t know why I’m writing about charley horses – but tonight these Charlie horse symptoms have woken me up a total of three time. Oh the pain, I don't think I've experienced such a feeling before.

At any rate, I have decided to share my knowledge and, unfortunately, vast experiences about charley horses with the entire world in an effort to help people all over the globe to relieve, reduce and hopefully – eliminate - the nagging ailment. 

A charley horse is an uncontrolled contraction of the muscle and produces a sharp pain that can many times, be very intense. Muscle cramps most often occur in the calf or foot, but they can also develop in other areas of the body, such as the hamstrings or back. Muscle cramps usually happen while playing sports or exercising – or, lying in bed. Overuse of muscles, injuries, muscle strains, or even staying in the same position for a long period of time can produce cramping of this nature. 

Nighttime calf or hamstring cramps (my problem) usually strike a person when in bed – and these cramps can many times be the most painful. It is possible that the day's activities such as a tough workout, wearing high heels, or taking medication like diuretics may spark the cramping. Another thing that can cause instantaneous cramping is pointing the toes sharply. 

Cramps during exercising can be brought on by a number of factors. Dehydration or sweating too much can create an imbalance in electrolytes (potassium and sodium) in the blood and overexertion or muscle fatigue, are common causes as well. 

For relief of a muscle cramp that has already begun, try any of the following: 

Stretch the muscle by straightening the leg and flex your foot upward.

Massage the muscle to relax it and apply a cold pack to reduce the blood flow and relax the muscle. Another good cure for a muscle cramp is to take a hot bath or use a heating pad for relief.

In addition, here are some practical ways to prevent muscle cramps. 

Always do several stretching exercises before and after workouts and keep your body hydrated by drinking plenty of water. 

If a cramp occurs while working out, drink either water or some sort of sports drink immediately. Remember, do not over-fatigue muscles and do not point your toes while stretching or sleeping. These sensible solutions can help both, prevent a muscle cramp or help to alleviate the pain that occurs from one quicker. Trust me, I know, although I wish I didn’t. 

Stay Hydrated 
No one really knows how muscle cramping and dehydration are related, but it is known that dehydration can be a precursor to leg cramps. Recommendations call for at least three full glasses of water each day, including one before bedtime. Of course, you should also drink plenty of fluids before, during, and after exercising or competing.
 
Stretch Regularly 
It is a known fact that stretching regularly can relax muscle fibers. I was always taught as a youth by my father, reknowned track and field coach, George “Papa Bear” Williams, that stretching, especially post-competition stretching, was the best way to prevent cramps and relax muscles. 

Train in moderation 
The idea of any exercising regimen is to gradually climb up Mt. Everest, not try to conquer it in one day. Sudden changes, or more importantly - increases -in athletic activities can easily cause muscle cramps in the legs.

Now on to the good part - how do you make a charley horse or muscle cramp go away? 

Well, after the initial shock – and pain – that usually makes people either grab their leg and writhe in pain or try to massage it out, the best remedy of all is to try and stretch the muscle. This of course, has to be done very gently. After relaxing the muscle, a good warm bath or shower is always a good way to relax the muscle, however, I prefer sitting as opposed to standing – especially for a leg injury. Obviously, if cramps become a persistent and recurring problem, you should immediately go to be evaluated by your doctor. 
Many times, electrolyte imbalances in the body can cause cramping so your physician may want to take some blood to analyzed that the levels of potassium and other electrolytes are normal. There are also multiple muscle-relaxing medications that can be prescribed if the muscle cramping is a chronic problem, particularly at night. 

So there you have it all about charley horses and muscle cramps.

*My Words, My Canvas*

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.2

Intimacy and Desire

Intimacy and Desire is a unique understanding of the way marital impasses are a natural path to relationship growth. The sexual desire everyone wants has nothing to do with hormones and sex drive, because we want to be wanted and chosen (not just needed), which only comes from your partner’s heart and mind, and ability to want. For some, and for various reasons, sexual passion and relationship intimacy may weaken over time.

A major problem in dealing with sexual desire issues: Typically the partner with low or no desire feels defective and withholding, and the high desire partner takes it personally. But Intimacy & Desire starts off showing how the low-desire partner always controls sex, whether they know it or like it or not. For example: The low-desire partner controls sex, when the high-desire partner says, let's have sex, and the low-desire partner says, well, I don’t feel like it, and the high-desire partner says, well, you don't love me, that's the end of sex.

Why and how did humans evolve this way? Desire became entwined with humankind’s emerging “self” millions of years ago, which makes human sexual desire absolutely unique.

There are four points I would like to bring up that add balance to intimacy and desire in a relationship.
1. Personal growth
2. Lasting desire,
3. Hot sex
4. Profound intimacy (i.e., “sex worth wanting”).
These four points are the cause, solution, and outcome of sexual desire problems.
Your personal history fits into any love relationships. In a love relationship, you confront your partner and talk about who you really are; you talk about your desire, problems from your past, and times where your life changed entirely because of a love relationship. Points of balance are always involved.

To improve your desire, intimacy, relationship, and change your mind—for those struggling with intimacy and desire try, “Hugging till Relaxed.” This is a therapeutic technique where you hug your partner until you feel comfortable enough to let go. Hug your partner for 30 seconds. This is a journey of sexual desire; self-exploration and personal development to better intimacy and desire delivers between you and your partner. By increasing your intimacy and desire you are creating a more meaningful relationship.

*My Words, My Canvas*

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.2